I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
