i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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