I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
