Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I had to cum in my sink.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
