You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
