whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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