Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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