I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Come share oat with me in your robe
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
