I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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