Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
