SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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