If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize