Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
