In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
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