i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize
