Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
