omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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