what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
