it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
