Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
