That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
