By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
