it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
