Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
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