I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
