Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
