He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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