And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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