i jhust puked up my retainher.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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