dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize