She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
