Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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