No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
