he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
