Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
