She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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