You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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