Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
