ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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