Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Define "chronic" masturbator.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
