I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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