she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
When are your genitals available?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
