oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
