They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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