i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
