these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize