I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
