Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize