Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
