if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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