glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
She needs sedatives and a leash
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Randomize
