But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
